I know that Halloween hasn’t even passed yet, but I don’t care. I freaking LOVE Christmas. I’m so excited that Christmas is coming. It’ll be my son’s second Christmas ! This year he’ll be able to interact with the toys :) It’ll be my first Christmas with my fiance, but it’ll also be my first Christmas without my parents. I’ll just have to go visit them at their house! :) That’s the thing when you’re an adult, you want to become younger again, but when you’re young, you want to become an adult. One thing is that I’ve began to feel since I became an adult is that I began to notice how much my parents actually did for me and I wish I would have respected them more then I ever did and still do for me. Appreciate your parents and what they do for you. Because one day you’ll wake up and they might not be there. Cherish every moment with your family. That’s what I love about Christmas, the family being together. Laughing, telling stories, joking around. I also love the food too! :) All-in-all I love Christmas.
My fiance always just leaves whenever he feels like it. At all hours of the day and night. I don’t care when he leaves during the day. But, when it comes to him always leaving around 11 or 12 and comes home at 2-3 in the morning. It makes me assume that he is cheating. He always reassures me that he is just hanging out with friends, and i know that it’s his friends that are picking him up because i see them picking him up. Am I stupid to assume that he is cheating? I just don’t know what to do anymore.. I tell him all the time that he is making me think that he is cheating, and that he is making me feel unloved, and pushing me away, and all he did was reply back with “your gonna kill my phone.” I know that i bug him a lot while he is with his friends, but i just want him to know that he is hurting me. *sigh* I just don’t know what to do anymore.. I just feel like we are falling apart.. My heart is breaking.. I don’t think he feels a connection between us anymore… </3